silence has always been my loudest scream.
sister—
wherever
you are now,
i hope there is
a beach.
starfish will always remind me of you.
everyone I love leaves.
You did absolutely nothing to deserve it.
she begins
tearing
the pages
from the spines
of her favorite
books
& frantically
stuffs wads of words
into her mouth,
praying it's true
that you become
what you eat
while she sucks
the flavor of ink from
her blackened fingertips.
can't i just be a paper girl with a paper life?
you may
not have left
(many) bruises
on my skin,
but you left giant
blackberry bruises
all over
my soul.
i still wonder who I would have been.
I am
caught between
mourning you
&
thinking
your death
saved me.
will you ever be able to forgive me?
you will think
your parents are
s h a t t e r p r o o f
until one day
you find out
t h e y a r e n ' t.
what it really means to lose your innocence.
in my
mind's eye
i always see you
sitting by yourself
at the kitchen table,
smoking your cigarette
& drinking your coffee
& wanting to be
anywhere else
but here
with
us.
were you set free?
you did ab